old age catching up

is old age actually catching up to me? im only 18 but u feel like im getting old and grumpy. about a year ago i'd kill to have the freedom to stay out until the wee hours of the morning. now, i have that freedom and i feel like i dont want it. whats wrong with me? ive been goin home at around 5 am the last few times i went out. tonight or should i say last night i came from a debut. at around 10 pm i was already getting tired and i've already been wanting to go home. its not like the debut was boring or anything i just really wanted to go home. i cant say its because i lack sleep 'cause even if i sleep at around 6 i wake up at around 3 which gives me a whole nine hours of sleep. thats more than enough. maybe im just getting tired of going out. maybe i AM getting old. at 18 im already like this. whew, good luck to me when im chris's or luke's age. damn red bull na to. oh yeah i got home at 1130 from the debut. hahaha

look who's laughing now?

hahahaha now you know how i felt!

what's love?

i was talking to my friend earlier and he posed this question on me, "how do you know if this person is THE ONE if you know youre also willing to go the extra mile for others?" yeah. how do you know? i told him that all that changes when you actually love the person. loving the person means you block out everyone else, you wouldnt even think about doing the same for others. i just realized that this a very divertive answer. 'cause no matter what youll always know that you can do the same for others. i mean, what? so does that like mean there isnt such a thing as THE ONE? like, everyone can be THE ONE? which leads me to his next question, how do you know if you love someone? the million dollar question is, what is love? i told him noone knows what love is. its just like blind faith. you dont exactly know what youre believing in but you just believe cause you know its there. im not convinced by my answer.

what filipino dish are you?

Halo-Halo: A medly of beans and fruits mixed with
ice, ice cream, and condensed milk

Which Filipino Food Are You?
brought to you by

Fortunate Fool

She's got it all figured out
She knows what everything's about
And when anybody doubts her,
Or sings songs without her
She's just so mmm

She knows the world is just her stage
And so she'll never misbehave
She gives thanks for what they gave her
Man, they practically made her
Into a mmm

She's the one that stumbles when she talks about
The seven foreign films that she's checked out
Such a fortunate fool
She's just too good to be true
She's such a fortunate fool
She's just so mmm

She's got it all figured out
She knows what everything's about
And when anybody doubts her
Or sings songs about her
She's just so mmm

She's the one that stumbles when she talks about it
So maybe we shouldn't talk about
Such a fortunate fool
She's just too good to be true
She's such a fortunate fool
She's just so mmm

insufficient wine, overwhelming fun.

its 2 in the morning. i got home a few minutes ago from tins. we had an incomplete wine night. yeah, incomplete. we only had 2 bottles of wine which wasnt enough. we didn't have cheese either. sad but the company of friends was the essence of the night. luke, pg, chris, toph,ton, choy, tin mer and mons all made the night good. thanks guys. i needed this night.

it was all good. from near kisses with a person of the same sex to dance showdowns with the songs "virtual insanity" and "freestyler". yeah, im called H2O cause of my liquid like fluid dance moves. uh huh. the night, the company, the fun actually temporarily filled up the void i have inside me. oh yeah, chris you should always wear your hair like that. you make me wanna ooooh aaaaah and forget abt manhood. im just kidding, but seriously you look HOT! no, uh im not serious...or am i? uh yeah. shit. you guys are the best!

Anton

oh yeah, i just had to blog abt this... Anton is mentally retarded. anton really really needs to see a shrink. damn retard, with his bleah blah blhea weeeah crap. shit man. para tipid! then tangina you know (persons name) yeah well his friends... stupid ass. haha youre the best retard i know anton!

Montemar

MONTEMAR, BATAAN MAY 13 - 15 '05

the trip was perfect! it couldnt have gone any better! big big thank you to tita ces by the way for shelling out for some of our expenses! we'll make it up to you! promise! we were all in all 11. Me, the three hererras, pg, choy, chris, mer, anna, tin tin and monica. thanks you guys! you guys were the reason why this trip turned out great! i should have more pictures but half of the hard disk on my phone got wiped out so i lost alot of our pictures from the trip! sorry! anyway im sure that the others have better shots! here are the pictures that was left on my phone.

Meriels sexy silhouette against the sun set

The highlight of our trip! we met David Hasselhoff

(we sure felt safe with this elite bay watch life guard with us!)

Yes, another picture of the sunset

Thats me pretending to sleep, but really, i was just posing for the camera.

(oh yeah i took that shot hahahaha)

Tin Tins wet look. ooooh ahhhh. seeeexy.

isnt Anna just so adorable???? awwww what? whatdya say chris?

Thats the face of a man that just drank a cup of kikoman mixed with coke. talk about spiked! haha

hola amigos! apenas intentando parecer atractivo!

thats me and mer!

sexy mons! nako may bago nang wall paper si mons!

carlo and tin tin! bed mates for only a night....never again. hahaha

huh?

hmmmm i've been troubled lately. many things have been coming up actually. im just not sure if i can talk abt it here. oh lord i need help. im considering a shrink. what do you think? haha no. exage naman. i don't know. just wanted to vent out here. cant say much coz the conflicts within my mind have not yet been settled. its all stupid and i just wished it would go away. sometimes i wish that i could go back to the past and just avoid everything. like, stay away from everything, from everyone. i dont know. its dumb. arg. shet pak tangina.

are you an angel?

a kiss would me magical. but, all i want is to be with you. im happy with that. just to see your face looking at me. your smile smiling at me. thats all i wanted. thats all i ever hoped for. dont get me wrong i'm thankful for everything, i loved everything. you were great you, were perfect but now im scared. scared of losing someone that was never mine in the first place. i hate goodbyes. i dont want to say goodbye. i wont, i cant, but ill need to. so ill start the first of my goodbye, farewell my angel. you were nothing but perfect to me.

Better Together Sweetie.

"Better Together" by Jack Johnson

There's no combination of words
I could put on the back of a postcard
No song I could sing
But I can try for your heart
Our dreams, and they are made out of real things
Like a, shoebox of photographs
With sepiatone loving
Love is the answer,
At least for most of the questions in my heart
Like why are we here? and where do we go?
And how come we're so hard?
It's not always easy and
Sometimes life can be deceiving
I'll tell you one thing its always better when we're together

MMM its always better when we're together
Look at the stars when we're together
Its always better when we're together
Yeah, its always better when we're together

And all of these moments
Just might find their way into my dreams tonight
But I know that theyll be gone
When the morning light sings
And brings new things
But tomorrow night you see
That theyll be gone too
Too many things I have to do
But if all of these dreams might find there way
Into my day to day scene
Ill be under the impression
I was somewhere in between
With only two
Just me and you
Not so many things we got to do
Or places we got to be
We'll Sit beneath the mango tree

Its always better when we're together
Somewhere in between together
Its always better when we're together
Yeah, its always better when we're together

MMmmmm MMMmmmm Mmmmmm
I believe in memories
They look so, so pretty when I sleep
Hey now, and when I wake up,
You look so pretty sleeping next to me
But there is not enough time,
And there is no song I could sing
And there is no, combination of words I could say
But I will still tell you one thing
We're Better together.

my birthday

Your Birthdate: March 3

Being born on the 3rd day of the month is likely to add a good bit of vitality to your life. The energy of 3 allows you bounce back rapidly from setbacks, physical or mental. There is a restlessness in your nature, but you seem to be able to portray an easygoing, "couldn't care less" attitude. You have a natural ability to express yourself in public, and you always make a very good impression. Good with words, you excel in writing, speaking, and possibly singing. You are energetic and always a good conversationalist. You have a keen imagination, but you tend to scatter your energies and become involved with too may superficial matters. You are affectionate and loving, but sometimes too sensitive. You are subject to rapid ups and downs.

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

Keys to my heart

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to those who are unbridled, untrammeled, and free.

In love, you feel the most alive when things are straight-forward, and you're told that you're loved.

You'd like to your lover to think you are optimistic and happy.

You would be forced to break up with someone who was emotional, moody, and difficult to please.

Your ideal relationship is open. Both of you can talk about everything... no secrets.

Your risk of cheating is 100%. You are not suited for a monogamous relationship.

You think of marriage as something precious. You'll treasure marriage and treat it as sacred.

In this moment, you think of love as something you thirst for. You'll do anything for love, but you won't fall for it easily.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

With or Without You

See the stone set in your eyes
See the thorn twist in your side
I wait for you
Sleight of hand and twist of fate
On a bed of nails she makes me wait
And i wait without you
With or without you
With or without you
Through the storm we reach the shore
You give it all but i want more
And i'm waiting for you
With or without you
With or without you
I can't live
With or without you
And you give yourself away
And you give yourself away
And you give
And you give
And you give yourself away
My hands are tied
My body bruised, she's got me with
Nothing to win and
Nothing left to lose
And you give yourself away
And you give yourself awayAnd you give
And you give
And you give yourself away
With or without you
With or without you
I can't live
With or without you
With or without you
With or without you
I can't live
With or without you
With or without you

more pictures from tagaytay

#41 for you

Come and see

I swear by now I'm playing time against my troubles

I'm coming slow but speeding

Do you wish a dance and while I'm in the front

The play on time is won

But the difficulty is coming here

I will go in this way

And find my own way out

I won't tell you to stay

But I'm coming to much more

Me

All at once the ghosts come back

Reeling in you now

What if they came down crushing

Remember when I used to play for all of the loneliness that

nobody

notices now

I'm begging slow I'm coming here

Only waiting I wanted to stay

I wanted to play,

I wanted to love you

I'm only this far

And only tomorrow leads my way

I'm coming waltzing back and moving into your head

Please, I wouldn't pass this by

I wouldn't take any more than

What sort of man goes by

I will bring water

Why won't you ever be glad

It melts into wonder

I came in praying for you

Why won't you run

in the rain and play

Let the tears splash all over you

EK/Tagaytay trip, May 06' 2005

Even if we were just a small group i still had tons and tons of fun guys! thanks so much!!!!




Master guitarist! hahaha fade into white baby!






Thats the face of a man thats been constantly molested by a "FAG"





surfer DAW yan!!!!!! surfer chick mons. sexy stoked BLACKENED. JK!!!





the little excited girl that ran out of hype.





This is not the end. This is not even the beginning of the end. It is, instead, the end of the beginning.





"...cause life is a pleasure with you by my side..."





mons, whos hand is that???





anton going crazy.

on the good note

to all the people out there that i care about and care about me in return. i just wanted to say i love you guys! really i do! even more than myself! no wait not really. i still love myself the most! but thats still a damn lot!

hopes and dreams

hopes and dreams were never meant to be thrown away nevertheless be shattered. but in this case, mine was. how could something going so well be ruined by just a mere line? perhaps the realization of the truth behind this line? definitely. all this while i was lead to thing that i was doing fine, that i was heading somewhere. but this line stopped me right in my tracks and showed me that i havent even inched from where i started. of course the cosmos had to play their part too. later on, upon reading this line, the lyrics of a song, some pictures and captions convinced me that ive gone nowhere. its like fate was waiting for this very night to lay it all on me. or more like, fate waited till this night to stop playing with me, to stop leading me on. sure i can take it. i can take anything. i always do fine after everything. the only thing i feel sad about is that it was all wasted. with the little time left i knew i could make it work, heck not just work but soar high. i knew i couldve taken it to the highest level..if only...if only i was given the chance.

MIKES APARTMENT

boys boys boys. tsk tsk. this isnt about the porn! hahaha

seriously now. this is for my friend mike.

please pray for the soul of mikes mom. she passed away yesterday at around 530 pm. she was diagnosed to have cancer a long time ago so her departure was much expected. but, either way, expected or not, the loss of a loved one still brings insurmountable pain. i pray for the Magcalas family, may they see the light through the darkness that theyre going through.

Mike, i dont know if youll ever read this, but i hope that you really do fix your life. you know what i mean. your moms only wish is for you to set your life straight. im sure of that. so please do it, if not for yourself then for your mom!

Would you ever?

Would you ever hold the night
With just a single hand?
Would you ever let me go,
And make me understand?

Would you ever kiss me softly,
As if that kiss meant good-bye?
Would you hold me, oh so closely,
If I was to start to cry?

Would the tears I cried for you
Make you feel my pain?
Or would you not care for me one bit,
And my hurt would be in vain?

Would a simple question,
Remain unanswered?
Or if you were asked who you love,
Would I be your answer?

Would you keep your word
Of being always together?
Or would this lonely life of mine
Last forever?

If I told you I felt sad
Would you come be by my side?
If I was to get you mad,
Would it hurt you deep inside?

Don't ever tell me you don't care
Because I just know that isn't true.
If your heart decided to love someone,
...Would I be the one for you?