The last breath before the big plunge

Sitting on the porch, smoking a fag, i couldn't help but stare off into the empty street infront of me. i sit and wait. yeah, i wait. for what? i really don't know. it could be that moment before the plunge that im impatiently waiting for. that one brief moment that youre at the highest point. that one second where time stops and resumes again. that one point you hold your breath, close your eyes and picture just what may happen next.

no.

i'm not talking about death. i'm not gonna die soon, atleast i hope.

anyway,

now what happens when you reach this point? no one can tell. you can either fall back from where you came from or fall forward into the unknown. think of it as a roller coaster, except, the machines that move it don't exist. it's the wind. the unpredictable wind that can choose to blow wherever it damn wants at any time in the world. fate, yeah i think thats what you call it. it can push you forward or push you back. of course, all in accordance with what it wants or merely just "feels like doing". It's sucks to feel this helpless when you're playing against the fates.

Now, what happens next? i don't know. YOU TELL ME.

so now i'm back to theologizing. finals are coming up. 4 days of hell and one night to look forward to. delayed gratification if you ask me. makes the whole deal much sweeter.

rhum cap kicks zippo, marlboro reds, 5 peso coin and darth vaders ass! who's the master of the universe now huh?! BITCH!