There's a knot in my chest. a helpless feeling of inevitable misfortune. Its something foreign to me. something ive never felt before and im not sure if its a good thing.

It pushes me to the extremes and i'm lost.

Will it really all be in vain? i hope not. cause if it is, i cant even imagine what could happen to me. i shudder at the thought.

Please dont let it be so. please let it be everything i thought it to be. please just let it be.